But if you’re not quite there, staying together will cause more pain in the long run. I have the feeling that you wrote to me because part of you is ready to end your relationship with your boyfriend.
My message to you: It is better to have a peaceful, amicable breakup now than a messy, drawn-out breakup while you’re thousands of miles apart.
The ex-girlfriend also will not stop posting on his Facebook wall almost daily, with intimate posts (“awww…
your stress won’t last much longer”), pictures of their families having thanksgiving dinner last year before we started dating, pictures of them dancing together back in graduate school, etc. I trust my boyfriend 100% and I really don’t think he’ll cheat on me with her.
They met in graduate school and went through some hard times together, so I understand why they stay friends. They talk on the phone 2-3 times a week, meet up for lunch/dinner.
My boyfriend once told me she’s so important to him that if we ever get married and have a house, she would be invited to our house for holiday dinners.
At the time, I was reading feminist and queer theory, participating in a discussion group about trans rights, and gaining awareness of how our society’s definition of masculinity harms both men and women. But as time went on, Ryan began dropping hints that his discomfort was more deep-seated than I originally understood.But about six months ago, I joined another organization with a better paycheck.And that’s when things started to spiral out of control.The fact that you’ve barely even discussed this with your boyfriend is pretty telling. I would only recommend doing so if you have an exceptionally strong relationship, have phenomenal communication skills, and are planning a future together.If you have a relationship like that, then by all means, go for it. Though things might be difficult in the beginning, everyone will heal from this. You don’t want to be on your deathbed thinking about the dream trip that slipped out from beneath your fingers. Wishing you all the best of luck in whatever you decide to do.Experiencing my freedom At first, I was nervous to not have him around me to depend on.But within a couple of weeks, I fit right into my new workplace and everything was perfect. At the same time, I met a great guy in my new workplace who had a huge crush on me. It was a laugh at first, and soon enough, I was having a lot of fun flirting back with him.I just think the whole situation is disrespectful to me and her behavior is very inappropriate.He’s letting her do that to me and to our relationship.The first time I met his mom, she could not stop talking about the ex.She told me their entire dating story, why they broke up, how the ex-girlfriend’s parents still think my boyfriend is the best guy for her (oh yeah, the mom is also good friends with the ex girlfriend’s parents). I did have a discussion with my boyfriend after this incident, and he thought his mom was inappropriate.