The report also lists novelty, eros, and commitment as aspects of marriage that are strengthened through one-on-one couple time and in pointing out these things, it compels one to remember that marriage is not just for bringing children into the world, it is just as much for the good of the spouses.
Stresses and worries can crowd out time for your spouse and your marriage.
Lack of trust is a huge factor, yet an even more frequent complaint is that a person has grown tired of or grown away from his/her mate, and life with their mate has become dull or boring with no pizzazz or spark.
Some of my clients, as they tell me their stories through both tears and occasionally laughter, say that what it was that once caused a thrill and provided a hard-to-articulate excitement either became non-existent in the marriage or rather ho-hum.
Keeping love and romance alive in your marriage doesn't have to depend on going on cruises or weekend getaways.
These everyday things can interfere with both our desire and finding the time to put into our sex life.
Having been wed for thirty years to the same man, I have learned a little bit about this union we call marriage.
After the amazing honeymoon and life goes back to normal, you envision coming home in the evening to someone you can’t wait to be with, and waking up each morning knowing all you care about in the world is laying right next to you. The emotion of love fades and then love must become true love because it requires an act of the will to put your spouse first.
This is exactly how you should imagine life together with your spouse and if you do things right, this kind of love will last much longer than just your first year together. So, to keep your love alive, a great thing to do is to keep dating each other after you get married. Isn’t the whole point of getting married to stop dating? Dating is just as important during marriage as it was before you married.
But all marriages go through trials and tribulations and the couples that last the longest—’til death do they part—are the ones that understand and practice some of the common principles of being married. But this is not meant to be a stress factor for couples preparing for marriage, it’s meant to be a tool.
There are lots of different tools couples need to keep a marriage happy, and dating is one of those tools for you to use and keep in your marriage toolbox.
My parents taught Marriage Enrichment courses, and our family was witness to many husband/wife teams rejoining forces, gaining new perspectives and appreciation for their spouses and the vows they spoke before God and friends. In watching my parents in action, hearing the principles they taught, and reading what the Bible has to say on marriage – its purpose, expectations and function, and how it works best – I have a great appreciation for two people trying to work out their differences to become a united team as husband and wife.
And I believe that once the foundation has been set – who is in charge of what area, the submission questions, what we’ll believe, where we spend our time and money, etc. Making that daily choice to extend those Little Kindnesses to each other to make life easier, nicer, more fun, and to feel appreciated. She built her life around his preferences – he built his life around giving her the best he could.
For many, that indescribable thrill initially felt can vanish within even the first year of tying he knot.
Listening, as I do, to countless men and women who have become disenchanted with their spouses, I have found there are many reasons this happens.