Coping with dating rejection

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You follow up, you wait, things usually don’t pan out.When you do find success, you realize that it came the way most things in life happen — organically, through people you know.Clinical studies have been carried out that assessed the intelligence of people after being asked to relive a particularly painful memory.It seems that the feeling of rejection and the emotional pain it causes is enough to fog rational thinking and actually reduce a person’s IQ, especially when it comes to short-term memory tasks and particularly decision-making.And don’t forget the other types of love all around you!The bonds you have with family and friends are more important than a few relative strangers’ decisions on whether or not to date you.“We met on Tinder, and now we’re in a happy relationship!

This is the best case scenario, a situation that everybody assures you will happen, regardless of how dire it all looks.Any way rejection is served to a newbie dater post-divorce, it feels crappy. When I first got divorced, I took every form a rejection I received personally – especially when I began online dating. ”And when I actually started going out on first dates, only to have some brush me off thereafter, my disappointment and self-battery went up a notch or ten.If I sent a man an email and he didn’t reply to me, I thought, “What doesn’t he like about me? Now, almost two years into my divorce and many dates later, I’ve learned many a wise thing about how to date AND handle rejection.Rejection plays a big part in all walks of life and online dating, like every other relationship, isn’t all flowers and butterflies all of the time.Yet, like many before me have said, it isn’t the rejection you should focus on, but the way you deal with it and rebound.You thought your first date went well, but now you are feeling rejected. Or suddenly he’s saying he’s busy every time you ask him out. “Am I not pretty enough, skinny enough, smart enough?Or maybe he was big enough to come right out tell you, “Sorry, but I’m only interested in you as a friend.” Rejection when dating is hard to handle! Suddenly you want to disappear from the dating scene altogether, imagining yourself alone and unloved at age eighty.So straight from this veteran in the dating trenches, here are four tips on handling rejection that I wish someone had told me:1. There really is a place for our brain’s sensibilities in managing dating rejection.Too often we let our sensitive, divorce-worn hearts take centre stage, when what we really need to do is assess it from a rational standpoint.Below I’ve outlined 5 facts about rejection that you might not have known and also 5 things you can do to get yourself back on track.Numerous studies have shown us that the same parts of the brain are stimulated by rejection as well as by physical pain which is why emotional rejection can affect people in a huge way.

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